Tuesday, July 12, 2011

80 Proof Acorns

Here's one way to consume acorns!
It's a refreshing beverage!  It's a paint stripper! It's a beverage and a paint stripper!

40% alcohol.  Sheesh.  At 12% or so wine is a little high octane for me these days.  I prefer the 6% of hard cider.

I do love the comments on the taste of some of the other liquors listed.

Tolkkotsul (soju) - An herbal medicine-like scent and flavor spreads in a mouth.
Its taste is similar to that of a ginseng liquor but rather milder.  Translation:  Tastes like NyQuil but rather stronger.

Sinyangsul (soju) - A descent scent of a Korean soil floats in a mouth. Free from soju-related strong odor and tastes palatable.  The ad team at Budweiser is going to be kicking themselves that these guys beat them to the next great tag line in adult beverage sales:  "Tastes palatable."  (Which is an odd claim to make right after saying that a swig of Sinyangsul is like sucking on Korean dirt.)

Pyongyangsul (vodka) - Burning taste. It makes a clear distinction from other “quaffable” liquors.  A good first step for those of you trying to kick your turpentine habit.  It makes a clear distinction to other "drinkable" liquors you can consume "without physical pain."

As long as acorns are replacing grain crops as the sugar source for conversion to these lighter fluid-like alcohol levels, I'm all for it.  I would just need a mixer.  A lot of mixer.

Thursday, July 7, 2011

Auburn Trees Hanging On

The oaks at Auburn University's venerated Toomer's Corner are hanging in there, after being (allegedly) poisoned by an (alleged) Alabama fan.  Who is (allegedly) a complete nutbag. 

In fact it looks like they will even be ready to be draped in toilet paper (a.k.a. "rolled") after Auburn victories this fall.  Assuming they are once again the highest bidder for the services of a premier quarterback. 

My favorite part of the linked article:  "Harvey Updyke Jr. — a 62-year-old ‘Bama fan with children named Bear and Crimson Tyde — was indicted on charges including criminal mischief and desecration of a venerated object. Updyke pleaded not guilty, and his trial isn’t likely to begin before football season."

Bear (of course as in Paul "Bear" Bryant) & Crimson Tyde?  That should have been someone's first clue the guy has a screw loose.  Even my children Golden and Gopher think so.

We'll keep an eye on the trial.  My guess is that someone will ask for a mistrial based on the football affiliations of the jury or the judge.  My hope is that football fans who never give oak trees a second thought will, as the result of this case, come to think of them as living, breathing organisms that can be grievously wounded or even killed by the pointless actions of people - intentional or not.